A Dazed Sirius Is a Happy Sirius
by Avalon Estel
Summary: Sirius is hit by a dazing curse, and Remus doesn't know the cure. Insanity? Of course! Written by Alu. [COMPLETE]
1. Gee, It Sure is Shiny in Here

A Dazed Sirius Is a Happy Sirius

A/N: Hello! I'm back! I did another Marauders story! (Calms down) But there will be a sequel, so don't be disappointed. (Squeals and dose a little happy dance) YAY! I'm gonna do my first sequel!

**Chapter One: Gee, It Sure Is Shiny In Here**

Remus sat in the dorm room holding his book. Wth Sirius and James off to torment Snape and Peter in the hospital wing, he was going to have a good day. He cuddled up in a seat near the fire and opened the book. The crisp vanilla pages of the book were calling to him. Oh, this was going to be the best day he'd ever had.

He read the first word: _The..._ - but he didn't get any farther than that because something heavy had just thrown itself against the door. Remus heard muffled talking. He wondered who it was, so he pressed his ear against the wood and listened.

"Sirius, you're supposed to open the door, not throw yourself against it!" hissed James' voice.

There was a long silence, then Sirius answered. "Why hello, James!"

"Sirius, the door!" James said desperately.

"Oh, right sorry." The doorknob slowly turned. Remus jumped back into his seat and pretended to read. The only problem was that the book was upside down.

Just then, the duo burst in through the door. "Hey, Remmy! What you doing?"

"Reading," Remus lied as Sirius bent down next to the book cover to see what it said.

"What, Sirius? You want to read what Remmy's reading?" James asked.

"Nah!" He snorted. "I don't speak foreign."

"Well, Remus. You know what?" James asked.

"What?" asked Remus.

"I didn't bring Sirius up here because I wanted to. I brought him because, well, he's not acting at all like his normal self," James said, timidly playing with his fingers.

"And why's that?" Remus asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Snape cursed him with a dazing jinx," James confessed. "So do you know the counter-curse?"

"Well," Remus then looked over at Sirius, who was attempting to cook a goldfish over the fireplace. "Maybe we should talk about this over lunch," he said as he and James dragged Sirius from the room.

"Gee. You guys are so FORCEFUL!" Sirius shouted before they shut the portrait door behind them.

They went to the Great Hall, where Sirius sat next to James and Remus sat looking at both of them.

"So about the counter-curse?" James asked.

"Yeah, I don't know it and the only place to get the book is in the restricted section," Remus sighed.

James pulled over pudding bowls for both of them.

"So, Sirius, do you like your pudding?" James asked.

Sirius threw his whole face into it and gargled, "GOOD!"

"I do think he likes it, James," Remus said sarcastically.

James grabbed as much of Sirius' hair as he could and yanked it up. Sirius absentmindedly licked some of the pudding from his face. Just then a random candle bounced by. "Gee, it sure is shiny in here," he remarked.

"Tonight?" James asked as he let go of Sirius' hair and let his friend's face once again fall into the bowl. Sirius only laughed.

"Tonight!" Remus confirmed.

A/N: Okay, chapter's over, I'm back to normal, and hopefully everything will be okay….okay…hopefully.


	2. Gee, He Sure is Ugly

A Dazed Sirius is a Happy Sirius

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! I hope you all enjoy the story!

-Alu, Avalon's SISTER

**Chapter Two: Gee, He Sure is Ugly**

"So, James, did you get the permission slip?" Remus asked his friend once he had reached the dorm room. All the other students were asleep.

"No!" James whispered and pulled something from under his robes. Remus saw that it was a cloak. "Who needs a permission slip when you can do this?" He then threw the cloak around him and disappeared. "Ohhhhhh!" he whispered eerily.

Then he flicked Remus' head. Remus ignored him. He did it again. Remus still ignored him. After a while James had hit him so hard he fell to the ground. "JAMES!" he shouted threateningly.

"Okay, okay. I'm going." He then shuffled over to Sirius to put him under the cloak, too.

"You do know those books scream if you don't get permission, don't you?" Remus asked, watching the places that the noises came from.

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure, whatever," James muttered, as Sirius disappeared, too.

"Okay, just making sure," Remus said as he saw his friends beaming at him from under the cloak.

"Ready to go?" James asked.

"I guess so," Remus sighed.

Slowly they pushed the door to the restricted section of the library open.

"Okay, we have to hurry! Filch will be here soon," James whispered.

"Filch? The caretaker?" Sirius hissed. "Gee, he sure is ugly." He giggled.

James then started to giggle too. Remus sighed and whacked the sides of their heads hard. It sounded sort of like this: "Hee, hee, hee! Ouch!"

"What was that for?" James asked, rubbing the sore spot on his head.

"Oh dear, James, I was only saving you from yourself and your stupidity," Remus said, a smile on his face.

"Oh!" James then noticed the insult. "Hey!"

Remus sighed and moved ahead so they'd follow. "Okay, jinxes…jinxes…Ah, here we go. _Jinxes and Their Counter-Curses_. Here you go, Remus," James whispered, handing it to them.

Just then someone came in.

It was Filch. "Hello! Anyone in here?"

The boys peeked around the corner.

"Yeah, like the person's really gonna answer if they're doing something wrong," James sighed.

"My goodness, he's uglier than I thought, and that's pretty bad," Sirius blurted out.

"WHO'S THERE?"

Remus and James flung Sirius and themselves behind the next bookcase. Filch was right in the next aisle. Then from out of nowhere, James started laughing. He couldn't contain himself anymore.

"HAH! I'VE GOT YOU NOW!"

Remus was thinking 'Run for your life without screaming'.

James was thinking 'Air'.

Sirius was thinking 'How much hair does Filch actually have on his head?'.

Of course they all went with Remus' idea.

The trio tore down the aisles and out the door. They stopped at the portrait of the Fat Lady and gasped for breath.

"Do…you think…he saw…us?" James choked out.

"No…not really," Remus answered.

"Do you think that was a wig?" Sirius asked. He seemed to be the only one able to breathe properly.

Remus slapped himself on the forehead. "Sirius? Must you be stupid all the time?"

"Must I?" Sirius asked, confusion crossing his face.

"Oh, never mind. Pixie dust," Remus shouted at the Fat Lady.

She yawned. "You may enter." The trio hurriedly stumbled into the common room and collapsed into three chairs.

"Lets never do that again," Remus moaned.

"Do what again?" came a sly voice from behind them. The three jumped up and looked over the backs of their chairs.

"Evans," James hissed.

"Potter," Lily said, then she turned to Remus. "Hi, Remus."

"Hi, Lily," he squeaked.

Sirius, on the other hand, was becoming quite bored at the conversation going on, and had stuck the tip of a quill in each ear.

"And you are…gee, I can never remember your name," Lily drawled, turning to Sirius. "Oh, yes. Now I remember. It's Sirius!"

"That's Sirius Black to you!" spat James.

Sirius hissed at James for saying his last name. "Don't say the 'b' word." Remus sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Oh, right! Sorry." James blushed.

"Do what again, Remus?" Lily interrupted, glaring once again.

Remus thought it over. It wouldn't be a sin to tell Lily. "Were trying to find the counter- curse for a daze jinx that was set upon Sirius. So of course we went to the restricted section, Filch came, we ran here, and…well, you know the rest." Remus inhaled deeply.

"The restricted section? Well, if you wanted to sneak into there, why didn't you just ask me? I have tons of ways of getting there and back on time and without anyone knowing," Lily said in a pompous way.

"You do?" James and Remus asked in shock. Sirius was busy with the quills in his ears.

"Sure I do, and I'll help you get it back there tomorrow." She smiled mischievously. "And don't forget your cloak" She then disappeared into the girls' dormitory.

"That was awkward," James said, shaking his head. "And how'd she know about the cloak?"

"Believe me, I've seen worse," Remus muttered, glancing at Sirius, who was now imitating a walrus.


	3. I'll Get You, Fly!

**Chapter Three: I'LL GET YOU, FLY!**

The trio sat in the dorm room, waiting for Lily to arrive. Sirius was still acting like a walrus.

"Uh, Sirius? You do know that that is wrong in so many ways," Remus whispered, holding his face in his hands.

"Oh, you got to admit, Remmy, it is pretty funny," James giggled.

"James, on a scale of one to ten for stupidity, you're eleven." Remus sighed, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, thanks! Wait, is this one of your fancy insults?" James asked suspiciously. Remus rolled his eyes again.

"I don't know. Could be." Remus smiled mischievously.

"Hmm, true," James drawled.

Remus slapped his forehead.

"Hi, guys! Sorry I'm late," Lily gasped as she ran down the steps. "It's just all this homework." She sighed.

"No problem," Remus said, shooing the apology away. Well, that's what it looked like, anyway. He was really trying to kill a fly that had been buzzing around his head. It huffed and flew over to where James was. It landed on his forehead, which he slapped rather hard and fell over.

Sirius, on the other hand, had currently pulled out a fly swatter and was whacking James in various places, also trying to kill the fly. Soon they were running, James in the lead, the fly next buzzing its heart out, and Sirius taking up the rear with the fly swatter. Remus slapped his forehead, which was beginning to get sore from the constant whacking.

"Did you bring the cloak?" Lily asked, ignoring the fact that James and Sirius were currently hanging out the window as the fly got away, smiling pompously.

"I'LL GET YOU, FLY, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!" Sirius shouted after it, clutching James' leg tighter so that he wouldn't fall.

"REMMY! A LITTLE HELP!" James pleaded. Remus ran to the window and started trying to pull his friends back up.

Soon everyone was safely back in the common room and Sirius was being distracted by trying to touch the fire.

"Remmy, I'm scared," James whispered to Remus.

"What are you scared of?" Remus sighed.

"Sirius, because he's muttering things to himself." James was now looking at him with big eyes.

"Like what?" Remus asked.

"Listen."

They both listened.

"Orange…Baddddddd………Snort!" Sirius then snorted and giggled.

"Ohhh!" Remus shuddered.

"So let me get this straight," Lily sighed. "Snape put a jinx on Sirius, so now we have to find the counter-curse and cure him. Did I forget anything?" Lily asked.

"No, you pretty much got it summarized flat," Remus said, looking impressed.

"Thank you," Lily giggled.

"Don't mention it," Remus smiled.

"Since you two are done with your little 'talk', can we go now?" James pleaded.

"Yes, fine, alright!" Remus and Lily answered at the same time.

_

* * *

Beneath the Invisibility Cloak…_

"Okay here it is-Ow! Remmy, that's my foot!" James whispered harshly.

"Sorry, but I can't help-Ow! James, get your elbow out of my eye!" Remus hissed.

"Will one of you get your friend away from me? He keeps on stepping on my robes! OH, NO! He tore it!" Lily whimpered.

"WHOOPSY!" Sirius giggled.

"WHO'S THERE?" Filch shouted.

"Okay, I hope this works," Lily said, biting her bottom lip.

"What's your plan?"

"Someone grab Filch's wig and throw it back and forth with someone else, while the others get the book back, then I'll perform the counter-curse," Lily explained.

"Well, who's gonna get the cloak?" James whispered.

"You and Sirius. Remus and I will hide behind two different aisles with Filch standing in the one in the middle," Lily answered matter-of-factly.

"Nuh-uh! No way! There is no way you're going to convince me to do this!" Remus cried folding his arms over his chest.

"I can't believe they convinced me to do this," Remus sighed from his spot.

"Everyone ready?" James asked from behind the cloak.

"Yes!" everyone else called back.

"Good! On three!" James grinned. "One…Two…THREE!"

"Hey, Filch, over here!" James cried as Lily grabbed the wig when Filch turned.

"I'm gonna get expelled…I'm gonna get expelled," Remus repeated to himself. Then he caught the wig. "Oh, no, now I'm really gonna be expelled!" He whimpered and threw it back.

"YOU'LL ALL BE EXPELLED WHEN I'M THROUGH WITH YOU!" Filch bellowed after them.

"THAT'S IT! WE'RE DONE!" James cried. "COME ON, MOONY! WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!" James yelled as he, Sirius, and Lily sprinted down the hall. But Remus was frozen in place. Then he was jerked from behind. He turned around in horror, only to see James. "LET'S GO!" he shouted.


	4. Isn't That Filch's Wig?

**Chapter Four: Isn't That Filch's Wig? **

Once they had reached the dorm room they were all huffing and puffing. Only Sirius was not out of breath. He seemed to be interested in a sock that he put on his nose.

He snorted and turned to Remus. "Hey, Remmy, isn't that Filch's wig?" he asked, then crossed his eyes, running after a fly that had just flown by. "COME BACK HERE!" he shouted after it, making a war cry as he flung a fly swatter at it.

Remus looked down at the wig he held, and whacked his head with his fist repeatedly.

Meanwhile, James and Lily were fighting in the corner.

"Well, I believe you owe me something, Potter," Lily said.

"Oh, and just what is that, Evans?" James snapped at her.

"A thank you, you imbecile!" Lily shouted.

"Who you calling an imbecile, you imbecile?" James shouted back.

"You, you dummy!" Lily bellowed.

"Why must you all fight all the time? I can't take it anymore!" Remus shouted, glaring at all of them.

"Sorry, Remmy."

"Oh, hush! No, your not! Look, you'll say sorry now, then do it again tomorrow! And don't call me Remmy, it gets on my nerves!" Remus snapped back. He grabbed his book and stomped off to the dorm room. After a few minutes they heard a door slam.

They stood there in shock, no one moving.

"You know, Lily, you should do the counter-curse. It's the least you can do for him," James sighed.

Lily sighed, too. "You're right."

Epilogue: Lily did the counter-curse. Sirius and the fly joined forces. And they all made up. Peter was in the hospital wing. The end.

* * *

A/N: Sorry, people, but I couldn't make it happily ever after, because, well, Lily and James get themselves blown up, Sirius gets sent to Azkaban, and poor Remmy thinks he's all alone. So there you have it. 


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